Sunday, January 3, 2016

Funny (and Not So Funny) Short Stories: How to Win the Title “Business and Industry Icon of the Decade”?

How to Win the Title “Business and Industry Icon of the Decade”?

With the help of Lalu Chaplus, Tivra Utkarsh, the rapidly rising industrialist, had scaled great heights in the business and industrial world.

But it was public knowledge that Lalu Chaplus used to use all the possible unconventional methods bordering on unethical or even illegal practices and they were mainly responsible of his boss Tivra Utkarsh’s phenomenal rise. However, it had been quite impossible for anyone to prove that Lalu Chaplus (and so, Tivra Utkarsh) were using really any unethical or illegal practices. Tivra Utkarsh’s company Soaring Heights had hired the top notch law pundits to make sure to utilize the grey areas of the law so that the methods adopted by Lalu Chaplus always fell into these grey areas and could not be proven as unethical or illegal. And in turn, they brought maximum gains for the company the easy way and in turn to Tivra Utkarsh (and so, to Lalu Chaplus) without being caught by the laws of the land.

The execution was always done by Lalu Chaplus and Tivra Utkarsh was always kept in the background by Lalu. Lalu always made sure that his boss was well protected from the law and projected as Mr Clean. So Utkarsh depended on Lalu fully. This way Lalu became the right hand as well as the left hand man of the industrialist Tivra Utkarsh for which he was being compensated more than sumptuously. Also due to this kind of proximity with the top most boss, Lalu became one of the most feared top level executives and all the people in the organization had to obey him if they wanted to safeguard their jobs. They dared not question the righteousness or otherwise of the diktats of Lalu. His orders were the last words in the company.
Despite becoming stinking rich, Tivra Utkarsh could not get the respectability either within the industry, business and political circles or with the general public. Lalu Chaplus assisted him in buying the respectability he craved for by some means or the other but so far the efforts had dismally failed. So while Tivra Utkarsh amassed tons of money, he just could not buy or earn the respect of the society.

Then one fine morning, an announcement of Business Universe- a prestigious world class business magazine attracted the attention of Lalu Chaplus. In essence, it read like this, “Business Universe wishes to choose the business and industry icon of the decade based on the public opinion of the entire world’s population. Each person can cast only one vote. Multiple entries by one voter will become invalid. The candidate receiving the highest number of votes will be chosen as the business and industry icon of the decade.” He brought this news item to the notice of Tivra Utkarsh.

On request of Lalu Chaplus, that evening Tivra Utkarsh and Lalu Chaplus had a secret meeting in the confidential sound proof home office of Utkarsh.

Utkarsh asked Lalu, “What was the meaning of showing the announcement of Business Universe magazine?”

Lalu replied, “Mr Utkarsh, today you are one of the top twenty richest people and businessmen on the earth. I wish to see you emerge as the business and industry icon of the decade. So far we have wasted our efforts to win the hearts of the people around us by adopting many means but that did not work. Now, if a highly reputed and serious magazine like Business Universe declares you as the business and industry icon of the decade which you definitely deserve, the whole world will start looking at you that way. You will get tremendous respectability in every strata of society overnight. The magazine Business Universe has great reputation not only among the people connected with industry and business but in the human society as a whole and people take everything published in the magazine as truth and very seriously whatsoever worth that might be.”

Utkarsh interrupted Lalu, “But Lalu, that’s next to impossible. So many industrialists and businessmen of the world who are already more established and more known by the people will always take away the title. It’s absurd. Come on, let us forget it.”

But Lalu was insistent, “Mr Utkarsh, please leave it to me. The greatest satisfaction in my life will be to see you getting installed at the top of the world. And I shall do anything for that. Just leave it to me and don’t ask me questions. Hope, you have always believed in my capabilities and approaches. Believe in me this time too. Do not ask me anything about it till you get crowned as the business and industry icon of the world for the decade.”

Tivra Utkarsh raised his hands in defeat and said, “OK Lalu, I cannot argue with you. I have to give in as I always do where you are concerned. Make sure not to get me into any trouble and then do anything that pleases you. Good luck.”

Then Lalu got into severe action.

He called an emergency meeting of all the heads of I.T. (information technology) departments and administrative chiefs of all the 31 companies of Soaring Heights spread in 9 countries in 4 continents.

Everyone attended the meeting setting aside all the other important pieces of work. Most important work for all of them was to obey the super bosses like Tivra Utkarsh and Lalu Chaplus.

Lalu Chaplus chaired the meeting (Tivra Utkarsh absented himself as a grand strategy). Lalu instructed all the I.T. managers and administrative managers to listen to him with utmost care and attention and not to interrupt him till he finished.

He addressed the meeting by saying, “This is a top secret confidential project of the highest importance to our group. It will be in the interest of you all to make this project a sure shot success. The project is to make sure that the group emerges as the most respected business group in the entire world. For this, first your super leader Mr Tivra Utkarsh should be seen and accepted by the world as the most respected industry and business leader. The famous industry and business magazine Business Universe has organized worldwide contest to choose the business and industry icon of the decade. Who else deserves this title but our super boss? Now, you guys tighten up your belt and start off with what I instruct you. Set up hundreds of kiosks and offices all over various cities and towns of various countries in all the four continents. Equip these kiosks and offices with large numbers of the latest computers and internet connections and the software. Staff them with people who are computer literates on three shifts basis. These temporary employees will cast their votes by using computers and internet in favor of our boss day in and day out under different names without stoppage of even a minute. Hand over these kiosks and offices to our various contractors who will take the responsibility of owning them and supervising their operations.”

Then Lalu Chaplus paused, looked at the attendees of the meeting and was satisfied to see on their faces a weird quizzical look. Then he continued, “As per the magazine Business Universe’s recent announcement the magazine wishes to choose the business and industry icon of the decade based on the public opinion of the entire world’s population. Each person can cast only one vote. Multiple entries by one voter will become invalid. The candidate receiving the highest number of votes will be chosen as the business and industry icon of the decade. So your job is to install all these offices and kiosks within next one week, staff them with employees, hand them over to the contractors and train the contractors on how to conduct the entire operation. The most important thing is that the magazine or their computer software should never suspect that the votes in favor of Mr Tivra Utkarsh are being cast by the same people repeatedly and that the entire operation is being masterminded and managed by us or by the companies of our group Soaring Heights.”

Then he wanted to dismiss the meeting. But one I.T. manager gathered courage to speak out, “But how’s that possible? Such repeated clicks by the same people again and again can be easily caught in the computer system since each such entry leaves a trace behind and we might be caught.”

Lalu was very angry at this I.T. manager’s question which he thought was quite stupid. He rebuked, “Well, any fool understands that. That’s why you have been called to think of all the means to make this whole thing look very genuine and well above any suspicion. And we are paying you the fat salaries to work out whatsoever it requires to achieve it. Write suitable software and do any other damn thing to make sure that the entire plan of ours is finally 100% successful in choosing Mr Tivra Utkarsh as the world icon of business and industry of the decade. The whole thing should look natural. Now get started without wasting a single second.”

Not a single I.T. manager and administrative manager wanted to get fired. No one questioned or talked about the ethical side of this project. They got busy discussing the working details of the entire project. Once they chalked out everything to its finest points, they returned to their respective offices in various group companies of various countries of the four continents.

The contest to select the world icon of business and industry of the decade took place as scheduled by the magazine Business universe.

The results of the poll were declared recently.

And right now the celebrations are on and are being telecast live all over the world and millions of people are watching on their television sets. Business Universe has organized a gala party at a seven star luxury hotel to felicitate Tivra Utkarsh as the world business and industry icon of the decade. A few thousand dignitaries are present in the party and Tivra Utkarsh is the center of attraction and the star of the evening.

It is understood that Tivra Utkarsh got the maximum votes of the public and he beat the runner up (who is one of the most respected and most known business wizard in the world) by around twelve million votes.

All the contestants are still scratching their heads to wonder as to what tricks Tivra Utkarsh played on them that they were unable to conceive and apply to win the crown.

Related Book
"Sensitive Stories of Corporate World" (available from Amazon, get it online)
Read many more management anecdotes/management case studies in the eminent author Shyam Bhatawdekar's best selling book "Sensitive Stories of Corporate World" available online from Amazon as an eBook as well as a printed book.
For everything you wanted to know on building leadership and management, refer Shyam Bhatawdekar’s website: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.com/
(Also, refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/)
For “out of box thinking” articles by Shyam Bhatawdekar, refer: (Out of Box Ideas) http://wow-idea.blogspot.com/
Read other blogs of Shyam Bhatawdekar at: (Home Page for Writings of Shyam Bhatawdekar) http://writings-of-shyam.blogspot.com

Novels and Stories

Novel "The Peace Crusaders" http://peacecrusaders.blogspot.com
Funny (and Not So Funny) Short Stories http://funny-shortstories.blogspot.com/
Stories Children Will Love http://stories-children.blogspot.com/

No comments: